Almost Famous (tc)

Several weeks ago the four of us and six other foreign teachers here in Hefei were invited to perform a song at an awards dinner. The reason we were invited to sing isn't because Molly can sing, and it certainly isn't because Renee or I can sing, the real reason is that they seem to enjoy putting westerners up on a stage and listening to them sing. They are also just nuts about Karaoke, and most everyone assumes we are too. At this first performance there were about 200 people in attendance, we sang a popular Chinese song "Friends". The song is in Chinese, and we practiced a couple times before the show. Apparently we practiced too much, because a couple weeks after our singing we were invited to perform at the "Evening of Happiness and Friendship" which was a celebration of the sister cities of Hefei. None of our group got together before this second show, our approach was to wait until about 30 minutes before our chartered bus came to take us to the performance, then to sing the song one more time while standing in our apartment. Our other band members did the same in their rooms. After all, it was just another awards dinner with maybe a hundred in the audience, or so we thought.



The Stage

When we pulled up at the venue we began to see the error in our imagination. Our bus pulled through a gate crowded with hundreds of people straining to see into the bus windows. Our conversation in the bus went something like this "there must be something big happening tonight, I wonder what it is?". We inched though the crowd, pulling into the center of it rather than away from it, slowed to a crawl, then stopped. The doors opened. We began to think that a little more preparation might have been a good idea. As we descended from the bus the crowd was hushed, I even heard gasps as we appeared, all we could see were cell phone cameras held aloft above a sea of faces, the cameras all capturing the moment, a moment which seemed to include us. We were lead through the parting crowd, I felt like Charleton Heston in "The Ten Commandments" as the Red Sea was dividing in front of us. The audience lined up, waving American flags and taking pictures. Whisked to the front of the huge square we were shocked to see the scale of our little Karaoke Night.



The Lighting

The stage was about 35 yards across, framed by two huge scaffoldings holding lights, rising at least 60 feet in the air. Away from the stage, sort of framing the audience, there were a couple other immense lighting towers, the sound mixers sat beneath one of these towers (I looked at them and thought "you can't mix enough sound to make us look good!"). We were shown to our seats, in the second row in front of the 1500 or 2000 people now sitting behind us. It felt like the Academy Awards.


Dylan and Molly watching the show

The opening of the show was complete Hollywood meets Las Vegas: spot lights played on the stage back, which was a 20 story building, so there was lots of playing room. Smoke came rising out of the stage wings, and the music was epic in loudness and emotion. We watched the opening acts from this close vantage, slowly coming to terms with the reality of what would soon happen. Our group was listed in the program as Foreign Professors of Anhui University. They would soon see just how foreign we were.


Dancers and pyrotechnics

My first hope had been that we would simply follow numerous amature acts and therefore not look too bad. Watching the show unfold we soon saw that this would not happen. There were professional Chinese dancers and singers that danced beautifully, bending and leaping and flying across the stage. Occasionally flames roared 20 - 30 feet skyward from the stage front, the heat was palpable from our seats. The performances were everybit on the scale of those at a concert in Central Park or perhaps in Hollywood.


Singers

The amazing thing was that we were not really even nervous. This was more like one of those strange dreams a person has, you find yourself in the position of having to sing to the gathered audience at a huge concert and, well, you just get up there and do it. And, just like this dream, we found we were the only performers without matching outfits. At least it wasn't one of those dreams where you find yourself naked in front of the audience. I checked my zipper.


More dancers

We also didn't have cool dance moves, unless you count putting our arms in the air and swaying soulfully. Ok, it wasn't that soulful, and the crashing of our arms into one-another as one of us swayed left and one of us swayed right might have given the impression we hadn't practiced this...

So, our turn had arrived. We were herded around past the sound mixers ("good luck fellas, this'll knock your socks off!") and up to the wings of the stage. Renee was fed last minute instructions by our agent (from our university) on what to include in our introduction. Oh, didn't I mention? Renee was asked to introduce our group about 10 minutes before we sang ... and then coached: ".. and be sure you say this... and make sure you say that... and don't forget this... and then you must say this..." Renee eventually ignored the input (which actually continued right until we walked out onto the stage!). I was in "this is a dream" mode, so decided that I would take my camera out on stage and take photos of the audience. Four months of being on stage in China had made me somewhat thick-skinned.



Renee introduces our act to 2000 admirerers


Molly and our group on stage


Dylan and fellow singers



The audience


The view from the stage, notice the "light sticks" waving as we crooned

Our singing was abysmal. I've always wondered in what situation one might decide to use that word. Now I know. One of our group who should never be given an electrified microphone somehow got one. Now, I can't sing, and I am the first to admit it, but if given a microphone I pretend to sing, not so this person. At several points in the song I looked over to see Molly and Dylan, and they had the most wonderful expression on their faces, sort of a mix of utter surprise and awe at how bad we sounded, and how our electrified fellow singer was tying us up with her unforgivable voice! I will cherish that memory of my kids, the sheer incredulity I saw in their faces as they looked at each other and this criminal singer in our midst was priceless! I think that I might have heard cats and dogs answering our tortured song, but I didn't, and that was because the audience loved us! I can find no reasoning for it, except that this really might have been a dream... but they were wonderfull! As we sang we watched the audience (fading to infinity, thousands of seats to the back) raising light sticks in the air, high above their heads, swaying with more rhythm than most of us. They even sang along with us. If I ever decide to make a living on stage I know where I'm going. And after our performance people even complimented us (well, not many people, actually just the father of one of our group who happened to be visiting China and came along to watch our show... but it was a compliment!).

So our gig was up. We returned to our seats and watched band after band perform. And these weren't just local bands. There was a band from Germany, some other more regional groups, and one band Different Drums was flown in from Northern Ireland two days before, only to leave the day following our concert. They stole the show in our estimation. And more, they were really nice guys. At the end of the concert we were all brought back on the stage to sing, ...wait for it,... "Auld Lang Syne". Don't ask me why. But we were hand in hand with the fellows from Northern Ireland, and then visited with them at the buffet for performers afterward. Below are a couple photos of them, and if you're interested to hear them, try http://www.differentdrums.info

Irish group called "Different Drums"


Different Drums